Hur gör jag för att komma åt en traumatiserande händelse?
2014-03-26 1 kommentar
With these words: “With my mother I watched my words, fearing of disappointing because she was the first to reproach my stuttering,” you no doubt have hit the target right on the bull’s eye as to why you stutter in front of your mother.
And, with these words, “she has never criticized my stuttering. Instead , she made me compliments about my physique,” you have hit the bull’s eye on the target for why you do not stutter in front of your sister”.
(Now, since you have spoken of your beautiful physique, you will need to insert it in an email so we all can see it.) 🙂
So, you have two parts of you that are at odds with each other:
1.Part that fears stuttering in front of your mother
2.Part that is fluent in front of your sister and desires to be fluent with your mother
These two parts are literally fighting against each other to “win”.
Fear of stuttering in front of mother (low self-esteeming) ß—————-àSpeaking fluent in front of sister (high self-esteeming)
These two parts fighting against each other literally “freezes” the mind leading to blocking. It is like driving down the road at 100 mph with your breaks on.
What would happen if you layered the high self-esteeming mental state with your sister on top of and through the low self-esteeming part of speaking with mother? This is a merging of those pictures and/or those feelings together. Which state would win?
How old were you when your mother first criticized you about stuttering?
Get a visual image of the younger you, the boy, that was overwhelmed with hurt when mother criticized him for stuttering.
Now, once you have that image and you can see the younger you, ask yourself, “What does that younger me need?” Once you have an answer, image the adult you going to that younger you providing him with what he needs.
If needed, you can image your mother giving that younger you what he needs. For, surely, your mother did not mean for you to become a stutterer – she meant the opposite. It was just that younger you, that boy, did not have the mental resources that he needed at that time to proper interpret mother’s intention. Forgive your mother; forgive yourself for misinterpreting and let your mother, mother that younger you.
Experiment with the above and let us know what happens.
Note: Give yourself a week of practicing this. And, “only” practice this when you are by yourself. Do not practice it when in front of family and friends. Doing so will most likely increase your stuttering because you mind will be on stuttering and that will cause you to stutter. Experiment with this as well. Use what works for you and discard the rest.
(klipp från email@example.com)